What's YOUR relationship with FOOD?

Eating takes us to the CORE of who we are - what we believe we are worth and can achieve in this life. Don't underestimate the importance of the way you eat with the way you carry yourself in life and the results you get elsewhere. How you act in one area transcends to every area of your life - are you present when you eat? Do you listen to people when they talk to you - or are you eating over your laptop and pulling out your iphone whenever at a social setting, stuffing yourself with chips or counting the calories that pass your lips and believe you need to burn off bad calories at the gym.
That is not normal behavior, regardless of how accepted it is in our instant-gratification and vanity driven society. Healthy is not the woman in the gym with the perfect body, who eats the perfect raw vegan or whatever diet. The woman on the treadmill who controls every morsel passing her lips, posting pictures of her abs on instagram and facebook - living in misery. There is no pleasure, and yet our society is praising for that type of behavior - woman and man alike. And it is NOT healthy. These behaviors do NOT make you happy. They make you controlling, restrictive and moody. And yes, this affects your intimacy level and close relationships as well.

Success is being happy, vibrant and well-nourished activating our potential in life regardless of what we look like - it's time to let go of that shallow judgment we all do when we decide whether someone is healthy and successful - because most people with perfect abs are NOT happy - they're controlling and restrictive and severely insecure. We must stop this insanity. We cannot move forward if all our time is spent talking about weight loss and measuring our fat percentages - it has got to stop.

Are you overriding your hunger cues; did your relationship fall to pieces because you didn't listen and pick up the signals that started months, years before? Same baseline qualities manifesting in different ways in life.

If you enjoy food - savor the bites, the flavors of life, usually you will find your connections to humans also deepen, because you have trained yourself to be present and pick up subtle signals in the moment, before they turn into red flags (overeating/restricting/relationship break-ups/etc. etc.).

Our eating is connected to our intimacy, love, money, our values and what we believe life is. That's why HOW you eat is equally important to WHAT you eat. Eating is connected to a primary domain of life... changing your eating, changes your life on a much more profound level than getting healthy, looking good etc. etc.

Do you get how important this is? Changing your relationship with food will TRANSFORM your LIFE!

The online conference for eating psychology is running online right now  - check it out here, it's great stuff.

STRONG is the NEW skinny!

Get fingerlicking recipes for health a-z here.

What's Your Story?

I think this shirt is pretty awesome. In fact, I am considering giving it to all my girlfriends.

If there's one thing that we all need to change, and that we in fact are in total and complete control over, it's the crap we tell ourselves day in and day out. 

And for a lot of us, it has to do with a very disturbingly poor bodyimage. Often we are so used to this, that we don't even notice that 75% of our awake time goes with talking crap to ourselves - and every time we eat, catch our reflection in the window and when we wake up - we tell ourselves how fat, ugly etc. etc. we are.

The issue is, that we in fact become what we tell ourselves - where focus goes, energy flows, and that's why it is imperative to let go of our narcissistic focus on our body, because we can simply never evolve as humans and reach another level of being and thinking, if all our time is spent with trying to fix a facade or constantly just hurting ourselves with telling how not-worthy we are. 

This is a huge issue, not just for chicks. The thing is, that it is incredibly emotionally draining and spreads a lot of negativity, when we surround ourselves with people who talk crap-talk consistenly about themselves. No one wants to hear it, and we need to stop for a minute and think about what effect, we are having on other people. Because we do affect other people. And you do not want to be that person, who constantly talks about dieting, needing to lose weight, needing to get married, needing to get xyz needing this needing that and yadayadayada. It's desperate and it turns everyone off - even your goddamn cat doesn't wanna hear it.

Even if you have to fake it at first - do it. Just stop verbalizing all your negative self-talk step 1, and step 2 find a mantra that reenforces the person you want to be. Step 3 repeat this mantra til it becomes your new story.

That's it. 

Simply changing your story and what you tell yourself, not only changes your own life, and how you treat yourself, but it also draws in a completely different friend crowd, and you will no longer be that person who drains the energy out of other people, because you are so caught up in your own vanity that you don't even notice others, but only you, yourself and your issues.

Life is too short for issues. And it's all in your mind. It really is. So get over yourself - there are more important things to life.

Neurotic Eating Tied to Emotional Nuttiness: Hello Hollywood.

Just adding to the bunch of studies that show how your eating affects your thinking and emotional health.

With a constant focus on thinness, garbage diet food products and a "less is more" default thinking when it comes to eating in the Western society; no wonder we are seeing a rise in neurotic behaviors and a general lack of people skills/compassion in society that manifest in a variety of ways. So perhaps we should begin consider exchanging marriage counseling for diet counseling: it is not uncommon that my clients report improved social relationships once their nutritional needs are met and matched to their genetic blueprint - which is not really surprising, since we need our basic needs met (cf. Maslow's hierarchy of needs), before we can evolve and connect to other people in a balanced manner and form healthy bonds that are not linked to abusive disorders or emotional dysregulation, simply due to not having mastered the art of feeding ourselves properly.

A new study shows that women with abnormal eating behaviors, such as binging or extreme fear of gaining weight, misinterpreted facial expressions in others, especially anger and fear, compared with a control group, researchers report in the journal Appetite. Women with abnormal eating behaviors mistook fear, bottom right, for anger, left, and sadness, top right, in a series of images of emotions, including happiness, top left.

Abnormal eating is associated with poor social skills and an impaired ability to recognize facial emotions. This study is the first to identify a pattern in recognition errors, researchers said.



Reference: 
Appetite. 2012 Aug;59(1):181-6. Epub 2012 Apr 24.
The influence of emotional intensity on facial emotion recognition in disordered eating.
Ridout N, Wallis DJ, Autwal Y, Sellis J.

A Model Conversation: Cindy Crawford on Getting Paid To Stay Skinny

The original supermodels (Cindy Crawford, Linda Evangelista, Christy Turlington, Chanel Iman, Lauren Hutton and Naomi Campbell) discuss style, substance and getting paid to starve to fit into a size 6 (...mind you, size 6 is what we call fat nowadays, with size double 0 - 2 only hitting the catwalk).

This clip is from a time when models still had brains, beauty and at least somewhat booty. Coincidence? I think not. After all, your brain is primarily made out of fat.

YOU ARE FAT! ...yeah, and so what?

Ad to fight child obesity in Georgia.
Is this helping the solve the cause of the issue,
or only  ridiculing it, making it even more difficult to get to the core of the issue.

This ad left me feeling slightly discombobulated, to say the least. 

My initial reaction was, "how dare they!... That is just tasteless!"

Admittedly, working with body image issues and eating disorders, as one of my specialties, by balancing those brain chemistry imbalances that are at play in combination with working with behavioral change modification, I am quite opinionated when it comes to ed triggers and body image issues presented in society.

Even though above ad is clearly crossing the line for good taste by inspiring other kids to make fun of the fat kids in school - I think it would be refreshing, if we could all get to a point where fat is just that: fat. You are fat. Yes. And so what - nothing to cry about. I am not telling you, you are worthless or stupid or unloveable - far, far from it!

Love vs. Lust.

We seem to forget - consciously or not - that being fat has nothing to do with your qualities as a human being or how lovable you are. You are very lovable! Never forget that the size of your derriere has NOTHING to do with how much someone loves you! Don't fall victim to not being able to decipher the difference between lust and love. Everyone can be lusted upon - only few are those who you will connect with on a soul level and love. You are selling yourself short if you aim for lust instead of love. Lust cannot replace love. Ever.

Yeah, you have fat. And I have kidney disease. Same, same but different.

I think a lot of us, when we overreact to hearing the words "you are fat", don't realize that sure enough, this may be said as an insultment, but in the end - it really isn't. It is just like saying "you have kidney disease". That is, if our society wasn't completely brainwashed by unrealistic ideals and a tendency to connect the bulge on your waistline with self-worth.

Health care professionals need to get the big picture of how we are contributing to poor body image and unconsciously sending a message to our clients of connecting bodyfat% with their worth as human beings. 

As a health practitioner or parent it is NOT OK to ignore the fact that someone is fat. 

And it is NOT OK to ridicule it either, of course. 

It is never OK to ridicule, whatever the matter is, so that's really not the point of this post.

Facts are facts.

If someone is overweight, we need to explain this to them in a neutral manner: that this will in fact kill them. And that's a fact. Curves are hot and scrawny is not. But come on now - we all now the difference between having curves and being obese. Obesity is a disease that needs to be targeted as such. Not a freakin' mental illness or taboo. 

Especially professionals working in the eating disorder field get terrified of ever mentioning to a client anything about too much weight, as they fear this could trigger relapse.

But guess what: clients are not stupid. And they are not going to trust someone who tells them that every shape and size is great. Every single one of us knows what size we feel most comfortable being, and we need to connect this with what is realistic considering the demands of our lifestyle.

Nervous Nellies

Messed up and sick body images that can only be achieved by starving yourself on a less than 1500 kcal diet is not something that anyone should aim for. That is where we as health care practitioners must work with the client on a wake-up call. If you are not an athlete or paid to starve yourself like every runway model these days do (often suppressing hunger pans with coke or "getting off" on starving themselves due to genetically elevated serotonin levels, which I have written about in another post on this blog), then don't go there. You cannot lead a healthy and balanced life with a bodyfat% in the single digits or a BMI below 18 (and don't forget the BMI was developed to also cater for small-framed asians - so if you are a of a big-boned caucasian descent, BMI of below 20 is probably not happening without a struggle for it). No - those people who claim that they are naturally that scrawny, often use drugs to mess with their body's set-point - and that includes cigarettes. 

Having too little fat makes you a nervous nelly. Your nerves need a bit of fat on your derriere to be cool and collected. And that's a fact.

But in the end: fat is just that - fat. It's like your doctor telling you, you have kidney disease. And hey, you need to do something about it. Or else, it sure as heck will do something about you.

Reframing our minds to accept the fact that fat is just fat and NOTHING else value based, is probably one of the biggest paradoxical obstacles right now in the health field. This is key to developing a streamlined approach to how we attack this epidemic in a tasteful and neutral manner. Without sweet lies that no-one really believes in, and that only makes for a distrustful relationship between health care practitioner and client.

Nobody's perfect. But 'it'.

Forget airbrushing - now there's H&M's computer created fake models.

This is just ridiculous. I'm really not even going to waste time writing about just how distasteful it is that H&M now creates body perfection via computer.

Yes - these models above are completely fake, created by what is supposedly the ideal by a computer.

No doubt this is great biz for the plastic-fantastic surgeons. 

Currently I am working out of Miami, a city obsessed with perfecting the shell, it is sad to see the amount of plastic that many succumb to in a desperate attempt to fill the hollow void within themselves, instead of working on gaining self-recpect and thereby a STRONG mind in a STRONG body! You will not emotionally overeat or fill your body with junk food if you have self-respect - it's NOT about fanaticism; rather it's about reaching a healthy balance body, mind and soul!

Self-respect leads to a hot body (and even more importantly: a wholesome soul)! 

However, starting the other way around: completely changing mother-nature out of lack of self-respect leads to a deep despair and disconnection from your soul. 

Yesterday, I was standing in line at some Starbucks here in South Beach... lost in thought... and then yet suddenly something caught my attention. The scent of blood. You can smell it when people are obsessed with only changing their shell because they are still hollow inside. You can smell it like an animal that's wounded. 

And that always makes me very.. very sad to see.

And that way of faking perfection via computer creation of mother-nature is a disgrace to say the least. And it adds to further disconnection from body, mind and soul.

We can have it all, if we just start with filling the void first and then the wrapping is a piece of cake... pun intended.

But this ad... well... Shame! Shame on you H&M!

Barbie is dead.

Cappuccino con nata

Inhaling my cappuccino con nata this morning (yes, whipped cream comes standard when asking for a cappuccino in La Gomera where my travels has currently led me to. And hey, who am I to argue with local cuisine couture) while rummaging through a German tabloid in lack of English, I stumbled upon Barbie's obituary.

Bye, bye Barbie

And that's about time.
Considering the amount of Botox needed to erase the trace of time and any sudden emotion on her face, her veins must be spilling over with nerve toxic waste, I reckon.

And god bless us all wouldn't it be nice to break the chains of the beauty, pharma and diet industry slavery and stop this idiocy of thinking that looking like Paris Hilton, Elin King, Victoria Beckham and so the list goes on, is normal. Normal? Sure - for a 16-year-old, not normal for a grown woman. King’s thighs can compete with my biceps for crying out loud.
Why these unnatural bodies are being perpetuated as the ideal is BECAUSE they are not naturally achievable! This is simply a way of manipulating your body perception and promoting poor body image; making you addicted to diet pills, treadmills, endless botox injections and self-esteem flat-as-a-carpet. Making you miserable in the skin you are in is worth big bucks - and trust me: The Don Draper gang 21st century is laughing their derrieres off all the way to the bank.


There is nothing less attractive than self-esteem flat-as-a-carpet. It is ugly.

My cappuccino AM daily dog

Ironically, the more plastic you fill in your body to make up for that lack of basic self-worth, the less connected you often fell with your true self and values. Well, afterall you are filled with artificial waste now quite literally.


Let's just say, I am not one to shed a tear at Barbie's funeral.
She has certainly played her part in perpetuating a plastic-fantastic image that has been part of grotesquely brainwashing an entire Hiltonesque generation.

Read. Eat. Breathe. A sigh of relief.

Ashley Simpson's nose job linked to body dysmorphic disorder

Body dysmorphic disorder:
Ashley Simpson has struggled with eating disorders
 in addition to having undergone plastic surgery.

According to a new study, one-third of people who get nose jobs also have symptoms of moderate to severe body dysmorphic disorder, a mental illness where a person is so dissatisfied with real or imagined flaws that it disrupts daily life. The disorder can lead to suicidal thoughts, eating disorders, depression, anxiety and -- as is evidenced by this study -- unnecessary cosmetic surgery.

The new research, reported in the August issue of the journal Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, also shows that body dysmorphic disorder is especially common among people who have had more than one nose job.

Vanity. It kills.

Reference: http://journals.lww.com/plasreconsurg/pages/default.aspx

Thirst. is. EvErYtHiNG.

Image is nothing.
That was the tagline for Sprite when I was a kid. That just stuck to my brain like glue. I loved that commercial. So simple, yet it is so powerful in the way it taps right into our basic human instincts - and it is everything I believe in, and aspire to be in life. Well, not that I aspire to be a can of soda exactly. It is the simplicity, the unpretentiousness, I find appealing in this "stripped-to-the-core-skip-the-emotional-pornography-BS" ad.

It just illustrates everything that matters: Humans are hedonistic beings, and when all is said and done, we are going to do what makes us FEEL GOOD.
There comes a point, when we have binged one time too many on the lies from a society that is driven by sick standards and ruthless motives that we feel sick to the core with all the shallow glossy ads telling us that happiness comes from a Botox injection, Agent Provocateur lingerie and a bright yellow Gallardo. Well, not that there is anything wrong with a Gallardo per se, I mean... if it is good enough for batman, who am I to complain. Afterall, we do need something for driving our surfboards down to the shore in, don't we... Bare essential really. Ok so I'm a sucker for fast cars. Anyway.
Back to the point. I am always amazed by the amount of insecurity and pretentiousness that contaminates the bare presence of people who supposedly have "made it". And God only knows they grow like weed in the city that never sleeps. Where everyone hungers for their 5 minutes of fame. And they will inject their lips with the fat taken out of their ass in their narcissistic vanity to win the fame game.

I just hope they understand, that somehow the clothes do not make the man.
And that for every Armani suit and fake bleached smile, and Manolo stiletto there are 40,000 children starving.
So, ask yourself - what drives you in life?
No, really ask yourself: What DRIVES you in life?
Do you know it, or are you being driven by others' motives and agenda perhaps.

Don't hate the player - hate the game, and refrain (from being part). 

Show me your shell, and I will judge you.

What if we were all the same; the shell that contains our soul was the same to the judging eye.
The first impression - would be what?
The scent. The voice. And then perhaps the actual contents of what we have to say.

And you wonder - all those people dealing with daily insecurities because of their bodily flaws according to our sick standards in society - would they blossom, when they no longer struggled with their imperfections?
Would they find inner peace, if there no longer was anyone condemning them for their visible shortcomings?
Would we in fact be flawless if we no longer strived for external perfection.

Sometimes I wonder: What if we left all judgement to God where it belongs.
What if we stopped pretending that we have the answer.
What if we stopped lying. Playing games. With others and ourselves. Games of deceit.
Would we all win then?
The thing we want the most - to win. Would we win back life if we stopped playing the game.

What would this world be like.
If we all were naked - emotionally and in the same skin.

Would we dare more, evolve more as humans, connect with our inner call, because the outside was out of our control and mattered not?

Italian Vogue: Fat is beautiful

Yeah right.

That was my first reaction to Italian Vogue with the new June cover consisting of lingerie lounging curvy plus-sized women.
No doubt they look gorgeous and confident on this cover, however, usually this size would be described as obese in the fashion industry.

Well, then, if this is obese then I don't know why we are fighting the obesity epidemic - because quite frankly these chicks look pretty damn hot.

I always get this suspicious feeling when I read yet another headline stating that "they are now all for curves" in one of those skeleton high-fashion magazines; considering that the average runway model has a BMI of 16, and the size of their thighs resemble my right arm.

I mean, HELLO! Seriously, if you think Gisele is curvy, then I don't want to see skinny.

Really, what is this...
Is this fashion or sickness being exploited?

Voluptuous can be far more alluring than the stick straight waifs we’re so accustomed to seeing in magazines and on runways.

Many of the women who have a few extra kilos are especially beautiful and also more feminine.

Flipping through this issue is the cure for anyone who thinks curves are a curse.

While curves are hot, you still want to make sure that the type of fat in your body does not promote cellulite nor release of inflammatory producing cytokines.

The Nutrition Doctor can design your body according to your desires and lifestyle. Make an appointment today to get started with The Body Designer™

The Model's Secret to look hot in a bikini...

Obviously some killer ABS don't hurt. And you can get yours by starting on The Body Designer™ program with The Nutrition Doctor.

But really, the secret to looking great in a bikini is to know what flatters you - right NOW!
A great body can look absolutely terrible in the wrong cut bikini.
And if you are among the 90% of women trying to shed some pounds for the coming season, you will most likely fall victim to boy-shorts and other disaster cover-ups that only makes your derriere look like it needs a zip-code of its own. Really, not the type of real-estate you want to look like you're investing in these days: The market is not buying.

Instead, do the opposite: Don't cover up your curves, accentuate what you got.
If you got it, flaunt it. Simple, really. Covering things up only make them seem bigger... as in all areas of life.

So being driven by vanity, yet in need of functionality for surfing and after years of trying this and that, here are the top 3 things to look for in a bikini that will accentuate your curves in a positive way, whether you got a skinny flat ass or some serious junk in the trunk.

Miraculous bikini by Victoria's Secret

1. Choose a low-rise bottom; it makes your derriere look smaller, but rounder and curvier at the same time. The Brazilians know it. And it looks hot. End of story.

2. Choose bikini straps that tie around your neck for max cleavage and support when running around and engaging in water sports.

3. Choose light & bright colors that clash with your sun-tan. Black bikinis are boring; polka-dots and prints are feminine and take focus away from less-than-perfect body-hang-ups such as cellulite, scars etc.

This summer I love the polka-dotted miraculous bikini from Victoria's Secret. It's comfortable and gives great support when running around the beach surfing and playing volley-ball. And there is a sentimental streak of naivety to it as those polka-dots remind me of the fifties. Totally adorable. Gotta love it.

That's a beautiful can...

(Remember to turn off the music player at the bottom of the right sidebar, before watching this clip)


Does this make you want to drink Pepsi?
That car. 
That stare. 
That hair.
...Heck yeah!

This is such a classic - and I adore Cindy, as she has that timeless class and confidence about her.
The power of her is so strong that whatever she does, you want to do it too. And don't give me that "Not me! I'm above emotional manipulation!" Darling, you are tricking yourself. No one is above being driven by their emotions; it's all about whether we are conscious of the game or not.
That can is going to be in your hand next time you grab something from the minibar. Although, it's not going to satisfy your thirst for passion...

Use the power of emotions to add passion to whatever you value in life. Passion is what draws people in. Passion is what makes people copy you and your actions. And that is ultimately the goal in life: To do something worth having others copy.

Never forget the power of action vs. empty words. People do what they see you doing, not what you say. Whether it comes from a can or you're on a quest to save the planet.

Choose your passion and others will follow. Passion leads to fatal attraction.

Knowing your weaknesses

What is the trait that you most deplore in others?

Think about it - because typically what we despise in others is our own dark side.

I.e. I couldn't care less about jealousy; likely because I don't have a jealous bone in my body (inasmuch as this is humanly possible anyway). However, I absolutely deplore pretension. The very scent of pretension just makes my hair stand up on my neck. Pretension comes in many forms. Pretending to be perfect. Pretending to be infallible. Pretending to be strong.

I used to be terrified of being weak; thinking that if people ever found out I had any sign of weakness/vulnerability within me, they would walk all over me and I would fall apart in a million pieces, never to be whole again. Well, newsflash: People will walk over you regardless, but only if you allow them to. And no, you will not fall apart. It may hurt, but time heals all wounds, and eventually you figure out, when people hurt you it is only because they are hurting; it has little to do with you.

Ironically, coming off as if you can't break, makes people want to see what your breaking point is even more. I guess it is part of human nature to be somewhat sadistic and to keep pushing the limits. If you don't set boundaries in life, then people can't respect them and won't know before they have already crossed the line. Pretending to be infallible is a recipe for a disaster, as you will none stop get attacked to prove you wrong.

Keeping it real: Connecting with your feelings...

The most obvious example being when we are kids: Those who bawl over everything and nothing get the most  attention. And those who bite the pain and never shed a tear get none. As much as I dislike drama and hypochondriacs, fact is that it is rarely those loudmouths that end up suicidal. It is always those quiet ones who cry in silence, never show their pain and thus never receive the love and care that every living creature needs in order to survive in this world. If you don't show your vulnerability, no one will know that you need nurture. You can't expect people to read your mind. And so you die - your pride ends up killing you. First emotionally dead and later... physically, however you decide to go about it before your time is up.You can change this unhealthy pattern. Risking vulnerability helps you remain sane - and yet, what prevents you from risking vulnerability is that you THINK you risk sanity. You need to remain sane enough to think rationally, and not rape everyone with your ever-changing feelings like another drama queen; yet it is key for your survival that you stay in tune with your feelings and show your needs. Otherwise no one can give you what you need in life. And bottom line is that makes everyone unhappy.

All humans have weakness - because without weakness their would be no strength, so pretending that you have none, is pretending that you are something you are not: Flawless.

The people who are often the most inspiring are those who dare be emotionally naked and show the scars that most of us hide behind our designer clothes.

If you risk nothing, then what is there really to admire? You are a scaredy cat: Hiding behind a shell, playing it safe. You are painting a pretty picture, but it is not real. It is an illusion that no one can connect with. You are guilty of adding more disconnectedness and loneliness into the world.

You think you are such a pro, because you are so careful in covering up your true self, that no one knows your fakeness? Everyone knows; except those dimwits who are also part of the same fame game. You can always sense pretentiousness from a far... it is not what you say; somehow people who disconnect from themselves have something about them that is so repelling in spite of the image they master to portray like an illusionist. But as anyone knows: Tricks are for kids. And it is so obvious for anyone not completely brainwashed by MTV that those who spend fortunes on designer clothes, hair salons, nails and what have you - always looking immaculate: Making sure that there is no outer sign of imperfection; they are seriously messed up on the inside. Otherwise they would not need to be so obsessed about perfecting their shell. This also explains why just about every celeb/model is either on drugs or suffering from borderline personality disorder. And more often than not: Both - and then some. That sort of narcissism brings sickness in its waters. Not a pretty sight.

You can't change what you don't know: Knowing your weaknesses enables you to prevent you from reaching your breaking point in all areas of life.

I often use a SWOT analysis to help design the life that my clients long for. This tool often used in business is valuable as it helps to identify strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats when organizing and mapping out how to achieve the goals you want in life.

You can download this tool here and email it back to us when making your appointment.

Attention Whore. Are You?

I have this friend who smiles. Like, a lot.

Marilyn knew the power of emotional pornography: 
Make people THINK you like them.
Unfortunately, faking your feelings and manipulating others 
do not lead to happiness;
she ended up the mistress and ending her miseries in an overdose. 
With a smile, I am sure.

I have often wondered why it is that she smiles at every joe that passes her way? It is certainly not based on her finding them attractive, more often than not she admits to finding them repulsive.
What drives these fake smiles, is that she so desperately wants to be liked. It has nothing to do with whether she likes someone or not. She just wants them to like her. And they do; or rather they like the fact that someone likes them (...). Both driven by vanity and insecurity they suffocate each other in smiles, niceties and hollow flattery only because they crave the attention, the affirmation that they are worthy of the attention. The only reason they compliment is to hear it back, the only reason why they smile, is to be smiled back at, the only reason they stay is to receive flattery. Words so empty and without meaning.
Their being nice is actually an act based on selfishness. NOT that there is anything wrong with being nice. You might as well add some hope to a world drowning in pain, and in many cases something like just being there, being present means everything. But motive is everything. You cannot hide your vain ego behind a shallow smile and old lines.
And there is nothing more distasteful than to witness someone lying through their teeth out of vanity.

And that is why I so firmly believe that the first step to getting the body of your dreams and gaining attractiveness, is to FEEL great in your own skin. Because a great body will follow.
And everyone deserves to feel comfortable in this skin.

Your face is just fine, but you'll have to put a bag over that personality.

Los Angeles is infamous for its not-yet-out-of high-school boob jobs and model/actress/waitress Barbie dolls.

New York is known for its fair share of Botox filled ladies-who-lunch-and-only-god-knows-what-else gold-diggers.

These godforsaken cities filled with man-made creations, gravity defying skyscrapers and the obsession with anti-aging, have such a draw to them that whatever goes on in the rest of the world, and however messed up their respective economies may be, they remain the capitals of the world. A weird love-hate relationship has always existed when it comes to New York and Los Angeles.

Either you love what they stand for or you absolutely hate it. There is no middle-ground. Everything is taken to extremes. That goes for the quest of ultimate bodily perfection as well.

So much time, money and energy is spent on perfecting what was perfect to start out with from the hands of our creator - quite frankly it is insulting. On so many levels.

Extreme measures, such as risking the dangers of liposuction with a body-fat% already below the thirties and Botox injected in girls in their twenties driven by vanity, insecurity and oftentimes a generous amount of self-hatred,  is not based on respecting your body; it is abusing your mind and soul and disconnecting from true meaning - losing yourself along the way.

And that always makes me want to say, “You know, your face is fine, but you’ll have to put a bag over that personality… because that is just one uglyass personality.”

The Price of Vanity...

30 % of women would trade at least one year of their life to achieve their ideal body weight and shape.

Kelly Brook: Does having a slamming body equal happiness?

Latest research conducted for new eating disorder charity The Succeed Foundation, in partnership with the University of the West of England (UWE), has found that 30% of women would trade at least one year of their life to achieve their ideal body weight and shape.  The research has also found that in order to achieve their ideal body weight and shape:

-- 16% would trade 1 year of their life
-- 10% would trade 2-5 years of their life
-- 2% would trade 6-10 years of their life
-- 1% would trade 21 years or more of their life

The survey conducted at British Universities by Dr Diedrichs also discovered that in order to achieve their ideal body weight and shape, 26% of the women surveyed were willing to sacrifice at least one of the following:

-- £5000 from their annual salary (13%)
-- A promotion at work (8%)
-- Achieving a first class honours degree (6%)
-- Spending time with their partner (9%)
-- Spending time with their family (7%)
-- Spending time with their friends (9%)
-- Their health (7%)

The survey results suggest that body dissatisfaction was common among the women surveyed, with 1 in 2 women saying that more needs to be done on their university campus to promote healthy body image.

-- 46% of the women surveyed have been ridiculed or bullied because of their appearance.

-- 39% of the women surveyed reported that if money wasn't a concern they would have cosmetic surgery to alter their appearance. Of the 39% who said they would have cosmetic surgery, 76% desired multiple surgical procedures. 5% of the women surveyed have already had cosmetic surgery to alter their appearance.

-- 79% of the women surveyed reported that they would like to lose weight, despite the fact that the majority of the women sampled (78.37%) were actually within the underweight or 'normal' weight ranges. Only 3% said that they would like to gain weight.

-- 93% of the women surveyed reported that they had had negative thoughts about their appearance during the past week. 31% had negative thoughts several times a day
-- When asked which celebrity has the perfect body Kelly Brook came top of the list. Let's hope she found happiness and not just another Botox needle addict.


Looking great and feeling great do go together, as it shows when you treat your body with respect. But exchanging years of life for perfection screams out loud that we are not connecting the dots: If you fail to heal your inner wounds and the reason why you are struggling with emotional eating, then you will end up a shallow, hollow shell with little else to offer than firm buttocks. And when all is said and done... we all end up like raisins in the end. So finding that internal happiness before you pursue the body of your dreams should always come as step 1.


That is why a Life Stylist is key to make for lang-lasting change and permanent weight-loss success.
When you radiate happiness from within it shines through. And you will want to treat your body with respect.

Article URL: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/221215.php 05 Apr 2011 

You're So Vain.

He is a 10. There is no doubt about it - judging objectively.
Everything speaks to his favor:
Ripped abs - check.
Strong masculine jawline - check.
Facial symmetry - check.
He falls under that tall, dark and handsome category.
Every time he comes by, the girls are throwing themselves at him - coyly giggling and fluttering their eyelashes to catch his attention.
And yet, when asked what I thought about said guy, I blurted out "Him? Why, he is UGLY!". Very classy, yes I know.

However, I was genuinely puzzled that anyone could find him attractive - after analyzing his features, well, it makes sense on paper, that he should be gorgeous.
The thing is I find him truly ugly. Now the paradox here lies in that I know people who have terrible features - on paper - and yet I would never in a million years think them ugly. Because they are not - in my opinion; even though yes, they may be overweight, yes they may have asymmetrical features and no, they may not dress in Armani power suits.
Yet, my initial reaction to this guy, who does everything in his power to live up to this image of what an attractive male should look like, was that he is drop-dead-ugly.

Simply because he is VAIN. He tries too hard. And that makes me suspicious: What is it that he is trying to hide underneath those layers of ripped abs and that perfectly groomed hair? What is his dark secret?
He comes off as a fake. He is not authentic. He comes off as someone who is not comfortable in his own skin, and thus needs to hide his true naked self; spending hours in the gym making up for his shortcomings.

David Beckham: Driven by vanity?

It's like David Beckham vs. George Clooney. Who is the more attractive in your opinion?

George Clooney: Driven by passion

You know Beckham has better abs. And he is taller. He is younger. He is stronger. But he tries too hard - an attention whore mesmerized by his own reflection. Only using his fame to feed his ever-growing ego and endless between-the-sheets escapades. In stark contrast to Clooney who understands how to use his fame for a greater good serving others, and then stand from it.

Or Cindy Crawford vs. Pamela Anderson. Who is the more attractive here?

What is she making up for
with those plastic-fantastic curves...

The naked truth: Genuinely strong yet fragile.
Confidence in motion.

You know Pamela has better curves. And yet... she comes off as a complete rip-off compared to Cindy, who admittedly has some cellulite on her derriere. But it just doesn't matter in the grande scheme. She is authentic. She is confident. She is who she is. Take it or leave it.

But someone who spends fortunes on pumping up the volume of their curves? Vanity. And that is ugly. Vanity is based on a mix of insecurity, pride and selfishness with an inability to show gratitude. A very ugly combination of traits, really. From that perspective, it makes sense that vanity is one of the seven sins. If you think that what you achieve in life is all due to your own glory and vain ego you will hit the ground hard one day.

I remember George Clooney saying in an interview with regard to whether he felt "proud": "You are never quite as good as they say you are, when they say you're good. And you are never quite as bad as they say you are, when they say you're bad."


That is being confident, yet not vain: He knows what he's got and not. And that is attractive.

Lights ON or Lights OFF?

Lights ON! Knowing what you got is hot.

Tacky? Why yes.
Let me rephrase: Are you comfortable in your own skin?
Because that is basically what it boils down to.
Being comfortable in your own skin seems for many to be a feeling long forgotten; left in the innocence of childhood, when our bodies only served as a vehicle for play.

In an attempt to regain that sensation of being complete many search for easy solutions... giving in to diet pills and the plastic surgeon's promise that he will make our lives bliss if we get that lift.

He can fix us. Make us perfect. Make us whole again.
Just take it off and lie down on his table. Inhale and when you wake up... your life will be complete.
Trust him.... after all, he is a doctor.

Broken promises soon to be... exchanging your Amex for a frozen empty stare. And your husband still has an affair.
So much pain. So many lies.
Is that all there is? You wonder.

Maybe you should have had that liposuction too - your ass has been heading south lately.
Vanity. It kills.

Being comfortable in your own skin has little to do with achieving perfection.
Being comfortable in your own skin comes from living a life of integrity. Being able to look yourself in the mirror. Knowing that every decision you make is based on the values you have in life. Now I am not saying that life is going to be easy, because it is not. Life is not easy. But the first thing, and most important thing you can do, before trying yet another gimmicky diet in your quest for long legs and amazing abs, is to treat yourself with respect and write down a clear-cut list of your values and beliefs in life. What are you passionate about? Where do you see yourself in two years from now? WHO do you want to be? What are the values that you want to represent? And then simply make sure that every decision is based on matching your values in life. When you know your values, everything else falls in to place, because your values serve as your inner compass when making decisions.

Don't get me wrong here: I am all for the beauty that life has to offer, but how you chose to get there makes for a very different outcome.
If your quest for long legs and skin-of-a-25-year-old is based on unhappiness and fear of loneliness you will find yourself very dissappointed after you leave the plastic surgeon's office.
He can't fix your belief system or screwed value set. Only you can.

I have yet to meet an attractive person who has been under the knife. Unhappiness and frozen gazes are not attractive. Accepting your imperfections (whatever that is compared to the latest airbrushed flavor of the month on the cover of VOGUE) is... hot.
Confidence is hot.
Knowing what you got and not is hot.
Not caring what other people think is hot.

You can't please everybody, so you might as well accept that this is the body God gave you and life is now. A funny thing happens when you stop focusing on fear and what you don't want in life: It vanishes. But first, you have to let go of fear. Until you do, you will be stuck; constantly attracting into your life what you are afraid of.

It takes courage, but that is the only way out: Accepting that nothing is perfect.
And THAT somehow just makes everything in your life perfect. Ironic, indeed.